Red Wings 3, Penguins 1: Post Game Snipes...

• It feels like it’s been forever since I wrote one of these. I’m a little rusty.
• First off, congrats to all the folks with DirecTV who finally got to watch their first Versus broadcast of the season.
  
• The Wings looked good last night. After these last few weeks, I finally feel like I recognize those guys skating around in jerseys with the Winged Wheel on them.
• One of the Wings’ powerplays was so good that the Penguins looked like they were a peewee team trying to keep up with the grownups. Unfortunately, it didn’t end up with a puck in the net.
• Versus showed a shot of Ozzie on the bench apparently whispering sweet nothings into Paul Boyer’s ear. At one point, I thought he was going to plant a kiss on his cheek. I guess he’s having a good time, at least.
• The Eurotwins were out in full force last night. Please tell me that there’s a photoshop out there with them in a Captain Planet cartoon combining their powers.
• Hank called Bertuzzi “Ber-toot-sie” in an interview. I realize that it’s technically the real way to pronounce it, but it made me snicker.
• Back in September, if you had told me that seeing Jimmy Howard look like he was hurt was nearly going to give me a heart attack, I would’ve laughed at you. Luckily, he bounced right back and was more than ready to perform some late-game heroics.
• I’ve never once said that Crosby sucks or denied that he’s a talented player. My issue with him is his insistence on acting like a spoiled little brat. His attack on Zetterberg, who did nothing that I saw to provoke anything, was cheap and selfish. Instead of trying to put a puck in the net, he was focused on cross-checking Z from behind. That’s the kind of thing that would’ve had me yelling at the TV if it was coming from a Wing. Not so with Pittsburgh fans as they were quick to rush to his defense. His comments after the game were absurd and just as indicative of his self-centeredness. There really is something to be said for class, and Crosby is completely devoid of any semblance of it.
• Jimmy Howard solidified his place in Wings fans’ hearts when he jumped to Zetterberg’s defense. I kept rewinding the scrum at the end on my DVR and rewatching it, and I laughed every time.
• This is one of my new favorite quotes ever: “I saw Jimmy coming in with his glove and Crosby wasn’t there anymore.’’~Z
  

GP Answers:
1. How close to the final horn are the Wings going to wait to score a goal this time around?
They scored with less than a minute left in the first, but other than that, it was fairly undramatic. The real end-of-game drama came from Gary’s baby.

2. Will any Wings fans even make it to the opening faceoff before wanting to toss their TVs out of the window due to all of Versus’ inevitable Penguin-fawning? This would be an interesting thing for me to try since I live in the basement and I’d actually have to heave the TV up and out of the egress ditch.
I solved this problem by not watching the pre-game show.

3. What great new word or phrase are the Versus announcers going to delight us with tonight? In the past, we’ve been treated to ‘mastodonic,’ and more recently ‘Danglelicious.” I’m eagerly awaiting more of their oratorical brilliance.
Sadly, we weren’t treated to any delicious creativity.

4. Who is Matt Cooke going to try to kill tonight?
It turned out that Cooke wasn’t the one the Wings had to be looking over their shoulders for.

Cookies and Cupcakes for Henrik Zetterberg
There’s very little that you can do to convince me that Sidney Crosby doesn’t have nightmares about Zetterberg shadowing him anywhere and everywhere he goes.

Drew Miller the Golden Facepalm
He missed another glorious opportunity. I don't know what he was up to during the two games I missed, but the last little stretch seems to have been filled with numerous chances that should've resulted in goals for him if he had a little more finish.

What I Learned:
A whole week without hockey is horrendous.